reflections

And so this is Xmas- blog was dead for a while a long one, a lot happened since that time I made a fool of myself and behaved as an idiot, I discovered power and feelings I was not even aware I have in myself. I was making decision about the future, having ups and downs and now I sit on the airport- writing very fast with my new letter system – since a month or sth my laptop doesn’t work properly- m,j,u7 are out of order, listening to this Song Happy Xmas and think, waiting for the plane to Poland with application to polish MC almost ready and…
Im lost in personal life in feelings towards some male;-) people I don’t know if I feel sth and if I feel what- friendship, love, passion, the hunter instinct just to know there are mines?
Im an MC PL applicant – with head full of ideas but also questions – too personal to share, to deep to just write, still process of writing it is rewarding, didn’t know so many people around are my friends, are so smart, so loving and passionate about things, didn’t know a lot about myself and people – I still don’t know many, but undoubtedly I know more
Im going to see in 2 hours my friends, my family how it is to speak polish, to be flooded with info- being foreigner is very comfortable sometimes you live in your universe, don’t understand what people speak, can explain some behaviours by cultural differences- funny isn’t it? Cultural shocks, challenge of being abroad for me seems to be more like safe shelter.